Shay2013: The Great Debate
by Plain Old Shahhida
Summary: Who is the better brother duo? Find out here on my talk show! Guest starring Dean and Sam Winchester, Daryl and Merle Dixon!


**Shay2013: The Great Debate**  
**Which is TV's better brother duo?**  
**Winchesters OR Dixons?**

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Shay2013: So, let's get to the topic of today's discussion. Just who is TV's better brothers? Is it the TV's badass brothers from The CW: Supernatural? Or is TV's…TV's other badass brothers from AMC: The Walking Dead? Let's meet Sam and Dean. (inclines head) So, Sam, Dean. How are you? How are you guys doing?  
Dean: Well, it depends on the season you're watching.  
Shay2013: Fair enough. How about this one?  
Dean: We're OK, I guess. Sam totally stole my spotlight, though, with the total trials gates thing.  
Sam: (turns) Whoa! Dean, hold up. I didn't steal your spotlight. I was saving your ass from that hell hound—  
Dean: Excuses, excuses (thumbs) every day with this one.  
Shay2013: Guys! Guys! We got a little off topic there. I meant, how you are doing, overall.  
Dean & Sam: (exchange a look) OK.  
Shay2013: OK (turns). Daryl, Merle. How about you guys? How, how are you doing?  
Daryl: (shifts) How secure is this building?  
Shay2013: Pretty secure. You don't have to worry.  
Daryl: I'd believe it when I see it.  
Shay2013: So, what's new with you guys?  
Merle: Well, lil missy, I'd say it's going preet-tee dandy so far.  
Shay2013: Really? That's great.  
Merle: I got me some tail last night from this trucker ho (shapes his hands). The way she could bend—  
Shay2013: OH MY GOD! No! I do NOT want to hear about that, Merle!  
(commotion. Dean wants to know more, Sam facepalms, and Daryl asks Where's my crossbow?)  
Shay2013: OK! Will everyone calm down?!  
Dean: You're the one shouting.  
Shay2013: (breathes in and out) Sam, how would you describe your brothers' appearance?  
Sam: (tilts his head up brings it down nodding) Ffffugly.  
Dean: (turns his head and squints at Sam) What?  
Sam: Well, just look at him. He's short and kind of scrawny.  
Dean: Scrawny?  
Sam: Compared to me, yeah. I mean just check out my guns (flexes). Pure muscle, that. And you, well you got those uh water pistols going for you.  
Shay2013: Sam, come on. It's not that small.  
Merle: That's what she said.  
Dean: Oh you mean that trucker ho from last night?  
Daryl: (laughs)  
Merle: Well lookie who came to join the big boy party. I hope you brought a can opener with you cuz—  
Shay2013: (facepalm) please don't say a can of whupass…  
Merle: —open a can of whupass on you!  
Shay2013: LET'S JUST GET BACK TO THE TOPIC (turns). Daryl, how would you describe your older brother's appearance?  
Daryl: My brother's the toughest sum bitch I've air met. But looks, that's a different story (room darkens). Do looks matter anymore in the real world as much as sticking a piledriver through the latest dickshit that want to take a chomp outta you? (darkens even more)Does it matter more that where your next meal comes from? (keeps darkening) If it does, then my brother is one handsome sum bitch (darkens completely).  
Shay2013: (crickets) I—I didn't quite follow that but OK. Dean, what's the most touchingest moment had you had with Sam?  
Dean: Touchingest?  
Shay2013: (grits teeth though a smile) Yes, touchingest.  
Dean: Every hug scene that we've had.  
Shay2013: That is a great answer. I love those hugs (grips pen). Damn those hugs.  
Merle: Pansies.  
Dean: Who the FUH—  
Shay2013: Dean! This is a family show! Stop that!  
Dean: (glares)  
Shay2013: Next question. Sam, what did you think of Dean's past girlfriends aka Lisa?  
Sam: The way I see it, Dean was very happy with Lisa. They had a great year together before I came back—  
Dean: (interrupts) Soulless.  
Sam: Soulless. Then he made her forget. He didn't even try to look for me (points to his chest). I found him. He goes off a year to purgatory and then shit hits the ceiling. Why didn't you look for me, he whines. We're brothers, he says. Where the fuck where you, man?! When I was freaking tromping around with no conscience! Where were you, Dean?!  
Shay2013: This is great. Where were you Dean?  
Dean: If I had any idea, Sam. I would have gone looking for you but man Cas was gone. Bobby was back in that lifestyle and I was just done. I was done man.  
Sam: (hides his head) I did things. I did things.  
Dean: I know, I'm sorry (pats Sam's back)  
Shay2013: Daryl? Does this remind you of the search for your brother?  
Daryl: Hell no (looks pointedly away).  
Merle: What the hell you mean? You didn't try to look for me, neither.  
Daryl: I did! You were gone!  
Merle: You just spected to find me picking daises out my ass did you?  
Daryl: I didn't know what to find! You always gone, Merle. You suppose to be my big brother, look out for me, but all you think of is yourself! Like last night—(stops himself)  
Shay2013: Wait, what happened last night?  
Daryl: (with attitude) You best stop sticking your nose into other people mess, you dumb bih—  
Sam: Hey! This is a lady. You can't call her a bih—  
Shay2013: It's okay, Sam. Really. I'm sorry Daryl. I'm just trying to understand the situation. We don't have to do this if you don't want to.  
Sam: No. he started it. Let him finish it (challenges Daryl with a stare).  
Daryl: We was out on a run. Got cornered. See him walking away with a hooker. Stabbed the Walker with a fork.  
Shay2013: Merle, did you leave Daryl behind?  
Merle: …  
Shay2013: (scoffs) Next question. Merle, do you have any nicknames for your younger brother? Does he have any for you?  
Merle: Little Asskicker. I used to call him that.  
Shay2013: What?! No way! Daryl calls Judith that! Daryl, how come you never told me that!?  
Daryl: Shud up.  
Shay2013: That is too cute.  
Daryl: SHUD UP!  
Shay2013: Aw, Little Asskicker Daryl.  
Daryl: You gun shud up? Or do I have tuh shud it for you?  
Shay2013: (still grinning) Well, we all know Sammy. Any for Dean, Sam?  
Sam: No, just Dean.  
Shay2013: Well, we know Dean is awesome at giving nicknames. After all he named Cas.  
Daryl: Little Asskicker is better.  
Dean: My foot is better.  
Daryl: How 'bout you come over here—  
Shay2013: Guys, a little restraint please!  
(they quiet down)  
Shay2013: Who is a better character? Bella from Supernatural or Maggie from The Walking Dead?  
Dean: I feel like Maggie is only there to eff Glenn. Does anyone feel that way?  
(lots of nodding and agreement)  
Sam: (nodding) Yeah. Bella on the other hand had an outstanding character. Her background, her job, and her motivation were all just excellent. It was great to watch and interact with her.  
Daryl: I aint just gun condemn Maggie, though. She need time for her character to grow some balls without the Glenn side of it.  
Dean: Yeah. We need her to be without Glenn for awhile before we can begin to understand her.  
Merle: She got a great ass.  
Shay2013: (nodding) Speaking of Glenn. What about the Asian characters on your guys shows? Kevin?  
Sam: It seems to me that both Kevin and Glenn are great supporting actors. We wouldn't have the same story line without them.  
Daryl: When Glenn told me he was Korean, was it racist I thought "Oppa Gangnam Style"?  
Dean: No, he'd probably be proud for you to think of that.  
Merle: Thems both seem a little stereotypical.  
Shay2013: I don't know. The whole redneck thing with Daryl and you seem a little stereotypical too but a great story plus.  
Sam: Yeah, it does.  
Shay2013: Alright guys final question before we reside to the audience for the tally votes. No comments, just answers, if you please (waits and casts a glance). If your brother turned evil would you put him down? Dean?  
Dean: I couldn't kill Sam when he was Lucifer. I can't kill him now.  
Shay2013: Sam?  
Sam: Me and my brother fight and risk our lives to keep each other alive. For all that, why would I throw it away? Never.  
Shay2013: (nods to Daryl)  
Daryl: In the world we live in I would not hesitate for a second to put an arrow through my brother's eye.  
Shay2013: (whispers) Merle?  
Merle: After today? I'd leave 'im. I couldn't bear to watch him go through that. Better not knowing than knowing.  
Shay2013: That's probably the most honest thing you've said all day, Merle. Thank you (turns).  
(to the audience) You guys have been a great audience but I have one last job for you. In the review section please put down who you think is TV's best brother duo. Thank you and good night.  
(turns and talks to Dean)  
(screen zooms out and fades out to a soft black)

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(LATER AFTER THE SHOW IN SHAY2013 DRESSING ROOM)  
(thunder and lightning)  
Shay2013: (laughs madly) I did what the world couldn't do! I stole Daryl Dixon's crossbow! (lifts above her head) All hail Queen Shuh-hamala-ay-ay20funty13!  
(busting through the door)  
Daryl: Bitch! Gimmie me back my crossbow!  
Shay2013: (clutching and shrieks) No!  
(blacks out)

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**Review, you guys!**  
**I swear if I didn't have Fanfiction to take my mind off of this stressful senior year I'd go crazy. Thanks guys for this.**


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